Feb 02, 2015 / Life

Quiet

Yesterday I realized in a three hour car ride back from Alabama how hard it is for me to be ok with quiet. I feel like something is wrong when there’s quiet.

I never drive alone in quiet, I’m always listening to music, or talking on the phone, or praying out loud…

I never sit at home without entertainment. Usually there’s a movie on, or a conversation with someone, or at least a book I’m reading…

I never sit in silence at work. I’m always plugged in and have three screens facing me at at all times…

Why is it so hard to be ok with quiet?

Something in our brains always wants to figure things out (or maybe I’m the only one that’s wired this way). It’s difficult to just relax and enjoy a drive, a night on the porch, a moment of peace between meetings.

There’s always more things clamoring for our attention than we have time in the day for.¬†Financially¬†this makes sense to me – there’s always more on my “want list” than I have money for (and I’m ok with this). When it comes to my time I haven’t learned this lesson. I feel if I’m not texting, emailing, checking, responding, or reviewing I’m falling behind on something. In reality there’s not enough time in the day to all the things I want to do.

For task-oriented people like myself it’s important to realize that there are more tasks than time. It feels wasteful of my time to not be productive but there’s also value in rest. One of the most reassuring verses I’ve ever read is God telling us it’s ok to rest:

“In returning and rest you shall be saved; in quietness and in trust shall be your strength.”
-Isaiah 30:15

How does that make any sense? Everything around me tells me that I’ll be stronger and better prepared for the week ahead when I do more to prepare. This verse turns that theory upside down!

It’s tough to trust this but the few times I have it’s amazing! Somehow as we rest and trust God to provide the time for our to-do list He gives us strength to accomplish more, or He gives us grace to accept we are limited in what we can do. No, it doesn’t make sense at all, but God is a mystery.

While I’ll admit I’m terrible at this right now – it’s reassuring to know that I can rest and somehow through this rest I gain His strength.

I thought through this all in the car yesterday and decided to give it a try.

I took a 10 minute nap…

Baby steps…